BooBoo

It's funny how the Lord goes about to teach us things sometimes. I have been reading a wonderful book, called A Woman After God's Own Heart, by Elizabeth George, and I have found the Lord challenging me in many areas of my life. I am so excited to allow Him to refine me to be the woman and mother that He has called me to be. I feel like He has brought me to such a wonderful place in the past several months and I am so grateful.

Let me give you an example of His refining...

So the other night after Elisabeth had had her bath (actually it was a shower...she loves to take a shower in our bathroom...it's basically like playing in the rain for her!), she was standing in our closet (before I had put her diaper on) and she began to pee on the floor. Of course Brian thought it's hilarious, but I happen to be a germ-o-phobe and like everything to be clean and neat and orderly. Well, this was none of those and I could feel the anxiety physically flooding in! I didn't want to scold her, because we are about to seriously begin potty training and I don't want her to think that going to the bathroom is a bad thing. Anyway, as the whole incident was happening, I found myself not wanting to be anxious, but wanting to be someone who could find joy in every situation. Maybe not laugh it up, like Brian, but I realized that it's just pee, it can be cleaned, and in the whole scope of life, it really isn't a big deal. I don't want to let satan win in those moments. I want to set a good example for our daughter, that although it's not the ideal situation, it's not the end of the world and worth being upset for any length of time afterward. So I asked the Lord to help me have that lightheartedness and ability to roll with the punches. It has been my prayer that even though our life is stressful and uncommon (with Brian's hectic schedule), I can be one to say, "Despite all that we are going through, our time as a family is far too precious to let satan steal even a minute from us! Our house is going to be a true sanctuary and place of peace and joy and love!" And not only do I want to say that, but I want to truly do that! And part of doing that is starting with the small things...like pee on the floor.

So, you know how you pray for things? And you have faith that the Lord will help you and change you to be as you (and He) desire? Well, the Lord is faithful and gave me my chance to try to be lighthearted when things don't go as I always want them to...when things are not clean and neat and orderly...And He truly has a sense of humor!

Elisabeth was reading some books we had gotten from the library earlier that day and has had a fondness for a book called Boo Boo about a blue duck. So she was carrying it around the house saying, "BooBoo! BooBoo!" everywhere she went. But after a minute I noticed that all was quite and I could no longer hear her. Silence from Elisabeth is usually not good, so I started searching for her, Brian right behind me. We found her in her bathroom in the dark saying, "Uh oh!". I flipped on the light and Elisabeth was holding BooBoo in the toilet!!! Brian, again, immediately started laughing and said, "That is a boo boo!", to which he started rolling in the hallway to his hilarious joke (I say that with sarcasm)! I, on the other hand, felt the anxiety come rushing in! I, frustrated, thrust the book at Brian for him to go clean up (it is a library book after all) and I gave Elisabeth a bath because I cannot stand the fact that she had toilet water all over her. Brian stated that it was clean toilet water (still laughing, mind you...and this normally gives me more anxiety), but my feeling is that if it's in the toilet, it's never clean. I was giving her a bath (I wasn't in the best mood at this point) when I remembered that I asked the Lord to help me to let moments like this just roll off my back. I gritted my teeth and pursed my lips, and thought, "Darn! It was a test, and I failed!" I felt that piercing feeling in my heart that comes from a moment of conviction. But I also felt a peace that I was able to recognize that this was just a way for the Lord to remind me of my prayer and that He is in fact at work in my life in this area. I felt hopeful that He is changing me.

And He has given me other moments since then to allow me the opportunity to win the "test." I have found myself stopping and taking a deep breath and thinking of how I can turn things into a positive experience. What can I teach Elisabeth about what has just happened? What can I learn from this? And I am learning that life is only stressful if I allow it to be. I can either allow God to show me what it is He wants me to learn and do or I can let satan win. Those are my only choices. And I think it's a pretty good lesson to learn.

After all, most things in life are just a boo boo.